Cop Out
by ivoryebonykeys
Summary: G.U.N agents, Shadow and Knuckles, are caught up in a case to bust a group of counterfeit ring smugglers and when they are suspended from case, they take matters into their own hands. Sonic parody of Cop Out. Shadamy and Knuxouge
1. Chapter 1: The Half Assed Mission

**So pretty much I was watching _Cop Out_ for the umpteenth time and then I thought** _"HEY! What if the Sonic characters starred in this movie? That's be hilarious!"_** I love it, so damn funny; AAAH, Tracy Morgan! I wrote it in a rush, so there'll probably be some spelling mistakes -spare me, grammar nazis!**

**If you haven't seen the movie, be prepared for a bunch of F-bombs and swearing XD (I suggest you watch the movie!)  
If you have seen the movie, you'll notice that I've changed some things around.**

**I don't own any SEGA characters or the movie/movies mentioned. Enjoy the story~**

* * *

Station Square; a beautiful city as big and busy as New York but this particular city wasn't just famous for its main attractions of beaches, casinos and restaurants but the people; Mobians, to be exact. Since Eggman's defeat, the years passed on and their popularity simmered down to the point where they could live normal lives and settle down; this is where our story begins.

The G.U.N headquarters bustled with agents and local police men who came together to take down the biggest mobsters and criminals in America. Being a special military organization, they also took care of other problems that arose from other parts of the world although it originated in the States.

"We finally caught a smuggler, he might be our best lead to find the rest of the counterfeit ring mob." said one of agents as he sipped his coffee.

"Good thing too, the Commander called in some of the Mobians to help the investigation. No doubt he'll ask for help from Sonic and Shadow; anyways as soon as they make it in, we're starting the interrogation." said the other.

As the two men continued to talk, two Mobians calmly walked down the hall as everyone watched them intently. One was a hedgehog who had been working with G.U.N for quite some time and was their top agent; with black and red stripes, Shadow the Hedgehog wasn't hard to miss and always got the job done. The other Mobian was a red echidna, a close friend to the famous Sonic the Hedgehog but his friendship with Shadow had grown ever since his wife, Rouge the Bat, who also worked as a G.U.N agent had gone on maternity leave; Knuckles gladly took her place as an agent for the time being.

Subtly, they headed towards the interrogation room and closed the door behind and began to plan out their strategies as they watched a red falcon by the name of Drench sit nervously in the interrogation through a the viewing glass.

"It's about time they caught this clown. He's been helping smuggle heavy amounts of counterfeit rings into some of the states, you won't find kids sipping juice boxes in alleyways." Shadow said dully.

"Shadow, we've been working together on this case for months now and we're finally gonna crack it open and get hit with all this shit., but pretty much all I'm trying to say is Happy Wedding Day." Knuckles exclaimed as he whipped out a card and gave it to Shadow, "The store ran out of normal congratulatory cards and only had adult themed cards."

"Okay, first of all, the wedding isn't until next month and second is screw you, Knuckles! I can't afford to screw up my relationship with Amy because of your bull." Shadow growled.

"Friggin' maniac…" Knuckles commented with admiration towards Shadow and turned his attention back to the criminal, "How are we gonna get the information?"

"Same strategy we always pull; you take down notes and I interrogate him." replied Shadow.

"Oh, so the top agent gets the pick now, does he? I remember the last time you interrogated a criminal, his ass ended up in the dumpster. It's my turn to be the bad guy!" said Knuckles.

"I don't think so."

"I think so!"

"No, I don't because you don't just interrogate the guy, you just take all the stupid lines from movies and show you've watched and use it against the criminal."

"It's professional acting! It's called homage; homage as in 'you better interrogate this fool.'"

"Whatever, fine. Find out who else is involved in the ring and just be quick about it." said Shadow as he pinched the bridge of his nose.

"Watch and learn, Slim Shaddy! I'm about to show you some french-ass homage." declared Knuckles as he walked out of the viewing room.

Shadow shook his head at his partner and decided to see what this card was all about; his wedding to Amy Rose was right around the corner and if he was able to solve this case by this week, he and Knuckles would be depositing money into their accounts more often. Pulling the card from his quills, he pulled off the bright pink envelope and unveiled a maroon coloured card with a white wedding cake and the words _"On the honeymoon…"_ in scripted in gold at the top. Nervous as to what was inside the card; he opened it up to a picture of a stripper popping out the cake and began to read the card.

_"I'mma let you lick the icing off and make you my bitch."_

Congratulations, Shadow!  
_-Knuckles_

_P.S. Pay no attention to the awkward greeting..._

Shadow once again shook his head and let out a snicker, "Idiot."

Meanwhile, outside the interrogation room, Knuckles unstrapped his gun belt and began to unload his gun. Taking a breath, he began to run in place; suddenly he felt the need to hit something and swung his leg at the water dispenser which began to bounce off the walls and slammed him in the face. Rubbing his bump, he took another deep breath and prepared himself to enter the interrogation room; kicking the door open, he rushed in and slammed the door closed.

"Woah, man-"sputtered the red falcon.

"Oh shi-! Are you a cop?" Knuckles yelled out as he pointed the empty gun towards Drench.

"No! I'm no! No!"

Turning his head towards the door and grasping his gun tightly, Knuckles began to yell again, "I don't have the drugs but if I did, my drag queen mama would cram her boot leg heel up your ass!"

"Buddy, are you trouble too?" asked Drench.

"You!" Knuckles blurted out, scaring the falcon, "My mama doesn't concern your ass!"

As this unusual turn of events took place, Shadow watched his partner incoherently scream at the scared falcon, "Here he goes..." he sighed.

"See this gun! I shanked a cop for it!" Knuckles cried out as he pointed his gun around the room and his attention was caught off when his cellphone began to ring. Reaching into his quills, he shoved the phone into Drench's face before yelling again, "And I took the bastard's phone too! If you move, I'll shoot your friggin' head because Mike Tyson ain't got nothin' on me! Who's this?" Knuckles asked as he answered the phone.

"Having fun?" a monotone voice asked through Knuckles receiving end.

"Who the hell is this?" Knuckles asked again.

"You are a pathetic excuse for an actor, dammit!" Shadow responded sternly.

"I took him to the candy shop and shot the bitch 9 times!" shouted Knuckles as he began to uncuff Drench from the table and pulled the criminal into a chokehold.

"Just get the information so we can go out and nab the other smugglers!" exclaimed Shadow.

"I took him down street and a gang war started!"

"All I can hear is gibberish."

"Give me the money or nobody's gonna live, beeetch!"

"I swear half your saliva is ending up through my side of the phone and oh yes, one more thing…"

"What?"

"You're not my type." Shadow smirked.

Disconnecting the call, Knuckles rolled his eyes and forced the criminal on to the side of the room as Shadow snickered in amusement and turned back to entertainment occurring in the interrogation room.

"You can't just ask people why they're white!" Knuckles said as he yelled at Drench.

"Let's see…uum, Mean Girls." Shadow whispered to himself.

"DO-YOU-UNDERSTAND-THE-WORDS-THAT-ARE-COMING-OUT-OF-MY-MOUTH?"

"Rush Hour?"

"BIOLOGICAL CLOCK - my career, your life, our marriage, and let me see, what else can we pile on? Is there any more SHIT we can pile on to the top of the outcome of this case?"

"My Cousin Vinny."

"HAKUNA MATATA, MOTHERFUCKER!" Knuckles cried out as he shoved Drench into the table and tumbled over it.

"Lion King, no shit."

"Say it…say it out loud..." Knuckles whispered into the falcon's ear and turned to the mirror on the wall and whispered again in hopes Shadow would get the name of the movie, "Twilight…"

"Who the hell are you, man?" Drench asked in fright.

"They call me, Tituba! I love me Betty!" Knuckles said as he pulled Drench away from floor and pulled him once into a chokehold.

"Hey, hey, calm down, I was taken in for the counterfeit ring smuggling too!" exclaimed Drench.

"What? You're the bastard that's been taking out my business?" Knuckles yelled as Drench began to run away but to pulled back and smashed his face against the mirror, "I'm gonna contort your ass!"

"Help! This guy is crazy!" Drench screamed as Shadow began to laugh at the idiot from the window; breathing against the window, he wrote out _'Gaydar Overload' _in a speech bubble on the condensation.

Back in the interrogation, it was time for the finale and with one swift kick, Knuckles had the table back on its legs and slammed the falcon's face against the table, "What does the ringleader have you do?" Knuckles questioned.

"I- the counterfeit rings get shipped to me and then a guy picks it up the next day from my store!" Drench stammered through his clenched teeth.

"Who picks it up!" Knuckles asked harshly and gripped the falcon's red feathers tighter.

"Storm the Albatross! There I said it!"

The door slammed opened as Shadow walked in and began to help Knuckles cuff the red falcon back to the table. Confused and unaware of what the hell was going, Drench watched both the Mobians before turning back to the burning red eyes of Shadow.

"Alright, Drench, you're going to give us more information on the pick-up and maybe you won't have to be manhandled by your cell mate in a low budget jail." Shadow said sternly.

"You better hope you don't send you down there now!" Knuckles mumbled humorously.

"The pick-up…it's today, I'm meeting him at noon." stuttered Drench.

"Thanks for the help because you just got blind sighted by a black shadow!" Shadow blurted out and slapped Drench's face.

"AND A SPIKY AAASS!" Knuckles bellowed before they walked out of the interrogation room to an applauding crowd and headed out of G.U.N headquarters.

* * *

As the city continued on with its daily routine, the important case of apprehending the ring counterfeiters progressed while the civilians bustled on unaware of the plan of action that was about to occur. Shadow laid low on top of a nearby building as a back-up in case things went wrong and as he watched for Storm the Albatross through his binoculars, he also kept an eye on his partner who was disguised in a banana suit.

"Get your groceries here, folks! Get 'em here at Station Mart!" sang Knuckles as he danced around, "You should get some chocolates and get back to your soap operas!"

"Yeah, because that really gets a girl's attention, Knucklehead." Shadow answered through his head microphone.

"Doubt it; I'm the idiot standing around in a banana suit. I think I should call Rouge and see how she's holding up." replied Knuckles.

"Can you hold it off 'til- woah, wait a minute…" said Shadow as he spotted a car pull up on the side and a large, buffed grey albatross exited the car, "I think we have our guy, Knuckles, to your right."

Looking over to the right from the corner of his eye, Knuckles spotted a grey albatross approaching the Station Mart that Drench owned and continued to dance, "Get 'em here, folks! Come on down!"

Stepping into the store, Storm began to converse with Drench who stood behind the counter and pulled out a large metal box. It was the usual trade-off between cash and rings that took place at the Station Mart.

"Was the boss pleased with the shipment?" asked Drench as he began to open the box for Storm to check.

"Stop asking questions and just let me see the box." Storm responded back harshly as he pulled out a roll of cash and threw it on the counter.

"Shadow, he gave the box to Storm and he's getting the money." Knuckles mumbled into his microphone as he watched the deal progress within the store.

"Alright, we don't move in until Drench gives the signal." Shadow said as he watched the store carefully.

Back in the store, Storm began to check out the box of counterfeit rings while Drench counted out the cash and foolishly gave Knuckles the signal by brushing his hand through his hair and was caught by Storm. Looking outside the window towards Knuckles and back to the nervous red falcon that wouldn't make eye contact with Storm, the grey albatross shoved the metal box off the counter and before Drench could respond, he was thrown across the room and smashed down into the racks of products.

Acting quickly, Storm pulled out a pistol and shot out the store windows that rained down on Knuckles as he jumped down to avoid the bullets. The civilians ran and panicked from the sudden turn of events and quickly reacting to the situation, Shadow jumped down from the building to aid his partner.

"Knuckles, are you alright?" Shadow asked with concern.

"Storm's getting out through the back! Get to the car and cue back up! I'll get him on foot." Knuckles said as he spotted the albatross run out the back door of the store, "It's peanut butter-jelly time, motherfucker!"

Quickly, Shadow ran down over to the G.U.N car and started it up as he began calling in for back up before heading on a high speed pursuit, "This is Agent Shadow calling for back up. We have one man down and one agent dressed in a banana in pursuit to apprehend the criminal heading north on 4th Street."

Storm was fast as he zipped through crowds and Knuckles was hot on his trail but the banana suit was the only thing that kept him going even faster; if only he could reach for the zipper.

"Stop, you steroid-guzzling crow!" Knuckles belted out but it didn't stop Storm from running.

Soon enough, the echidna came across a drift store and noticed a penny-farthing bicycle on display by the windows and got an idea. Running into the store, he came across the owner and a group of teenagers, "G.U.N! Sir, I need that bike by the window! Emergency!" huffed Knuckles.

"I was buying it first!" said one of the teenagers.

"Well, too bad, kid! I need it, now!" replied Knuckles as he placed the money on the counter but was stunned when the teenager pulled the bike off the display and tried to ride off with it.

"Hey, kid! I said G.U.N! Now, get off!" Knuckles said as he pushed the kid off the penny-farthing bicycle and rode it down the street in haste. Unfortunately for Knuckles, the Doberman that had accompanied one of the teenagers had gotten loose and began to chase after Knuckles; barking madly at Knuckles, the red echidna began to pedal faster to try and get away from the stark mad dog.

"Down! Down, you cramped-ass lassie!" Knuckles blurted out before the dog jumped and took Knuckles down and the bike with him too; screaming and kicking, Knuckles continued to fend off the crazy dog, "Bitch Pongo, get off me!"

Meanwhile, Shadow continued looking around the grey albatross as he drove around the neighbourhood and finally caught a glimpse of Storm jumping buildings; frustrated and annoyed, the dark hedgehog quickly got out of the car, pulled out a Chaos Emerald from his quills and chaos controlled himself on top of the building Storm had jumped over to. Ending up a few feet in front of Storm, Shadow pulled out his gun and Storm began to shoot over Shadow; taking protection behind a weatherproof electrical box, Shadow jumped out and returned fire. The firearms war didn't for long 'till Storm had finally run out of bullets.

"Slide the gun over and put your hands up, Storm! It's game over!" Shadow yelled over.

Storm's gun slid down to Shadow's feet and he stood up with his hands behind his head; Shadow watched the albatross intently before reaching down to pick up the gun for a second and looked back up to see that Storm wasn't there anymore; he was sliding down the electricity lines until he finally let go and landed up on the middle the street and made another dash.

"Dammit!" Shadow growled before he teleported himself back down to ground zero through Chaos Control again.

Unaware of the heavy traffic, Shadow kept his eyes on the retreating albatross and before he could run, a small Chevy rammed right into the dark hedgehog, sending him over the car and falling off the side. Groaning in pain, he pulled himself up on all fours and his eyes fell upon his partner who was pedalling over to him in a rush on a penny-farthing.

"What the hell, Shadow? I'm pulling 300m/hour and you're friggin' crawling around like some brain-dead snail?" Knuckles belted out.

* * *

**TAAA-DAAA! The beginning of the movie is hilarious and there's much more too come!**


	2. Chapter 2: The Consequences

**Chapter 2 is finally up! Woop woop!  
****Be prepared for a bunch of F-bombs and swearing!**  


**I don't own any SEGA characters or the movie/movies mentioned. Enjoy the story~**

* * *

An old warehouse at the edge of town was bursting with loud music; the area was completely empty and there was no one around for work or to yell for the music to be turned down. All because they were too afraid to come around but inside the warehouse resided a green hawk by the name of Jet who sat on top one of the metal crates as he watched the blue lake from outside a large window. Lowering the music on the radio, his ears picked up on the creaking of the door and watched as his friend walked into the warehouse.

"I'm glad to see you're safe, Storm." said Jet as he pulled out a cigarette and lighted it up, "Drench was not a falcon, he was a snake."

"A cowardly snake." Storm smirked.

"I can't wait 'til our boys get into those bank accounts and counter off that money; when we get that money, we're going to expand our counterfeit ring gang into a global profit." Jet said as he puffed out a cloud of smoke, "I'll only some business to take care off, my friend and we'll be on our way."

The doors of the warehouse burst open to reveal three Babylonians; two birds holding blue jay in their arms to prevent his escape. Pushing him forcefully in front of Jet, the terrified blue jay stood up straight but continued to shiver.

"What happened to my car, Slash?" Jet asked the blue jay calmly.

"Last night, two of the Babylonians I hired went and got your car from the docks and they left the car in a parking lot to go get a drink but they came out it the car was gone." Slash confessed.

"If I were you, what do you think I'd do?" Jet asked as he blew out a stream of smoke in the blue jay's face.

"Don't worry, I'll find those two and take care of them." Slash said bravely.

"_That _will be my job to find them _now_." Jet said as he smirked darkly at Slash then at Storm and turned away as a mangled scream filled the emptiness of the warehouse.

* * *

The G.U.N commander calmly stared outside his office window and watched the blue lake flow in a peaceful rhythm in the evening light. He'd prefer to be in peace as he watched the calming lake instead of turning around to the two Mobians who had completely fucked up the case of catching the Babylon Rogues. He felt his blood begin to boil and sat his in comfy office chair as the two Mobians kept silent.

"The G.U.N has always carried out their work for the best of country and world but then there's you two who worked so diligently and then one day, you decided to screw it all up! A whole case could have gotten out of whack because of you two idiots and I congratulate you for embarrassing the G.U.N." grumbled the commander.

"Thank you, Commander." Knuckles said politely and was greeted with a disapproving glare from Shadow.

"Explain yourself, Shadow." the Commander demanded.

"I have no idea, sir. The whole plan just decided to give in; these Babylon Rogues haven't got any consideration, no respect or any careful strategy. They just take what they want and pay the price later." said Shadow.

"They have their strategy and we have ours and clearly you two didn't carry it out! Groups of counterfeit ring smugglers are shipping all their cargo into Square Station every damn day and half my guys are ending up six feet under." said the Commander.

"Don't worry, sir! Me and Shadow are fine." Knuckles smiled as he patted his banana suit.

"You better worry because I'm suspending you two for a month with no pay!" yelled the Commander.

The two Mobians stared at the Commander in complete confusion; 30 days without pay! They were the most respected agents in G.U.N and they were getting suspended for one little slip! Whilst Knuckles had two mouths to feed at home, Shadow couldn't help but think about one thing that sent his head whirling; his wedding.

"Are you kidding me? We didn't even kill anyone! We're running around-" Shadow said sternly.

"I need this case wrapped up as soon as possible and I don't want to you to screw it up again! You cause $1,000 in damage and your friend decides to beat up a damn kid!" the Commander argued back.

"In a friggin' banana suit, Knuckles almost got- wait… you beat up a kid?" Shadow asked Knuckles in confusion.

"I needed that bike." Knuckles said.

"It's all over the damn internet and you can look it up on Youtube." The Commander said.

"Are you serious? I wonder how many hits I got, how many did I get?" Knuckles asked the Commander.

"Two; one from me and the another from the Chief of Police. Now both of you, out of here." Commander said.

"Commander, you remember Amy Rose? The pink hedgehog that you met and told you I had been dating, well guess what? I'm going to be marrying her in two months and I need this money to hold everything down!" growled Shadow as he watched the Commander sign some papers.

"I don't care, Shadow. Guns and badges." the Commander replied.

Shadow felt his veins begin to burst from anger; not care? Glaring at the uncaring son of bitch completely screwing up everything he worked so hard for, he reached into his quills, pulled out his G.U.N badge and unbuckled his gun belt. Slamming them onto the Commander's desk, he stormed out of the office as he muttered colourful words under his breath. Knuckles placed his belongings onto the desk and slapped the bottled water off the Commander's desk and swaggered out into the hallway in his banana suit.

"Damn birds screwing up everything and then we get pulled into some stupid banana business-"Shadow growled as they continued to walk down the hallway.

"How the hell in a dog that fast? I've seen some shark on Discovery and that dog's a hundred percent killer-"said Knuckles with great annoyance.

"Then you beat up a kid and applause to the damn dog who could catch up to a banana -" Shadow continued angrily.

"Putting up your bullshit for some mass attack and lying down on the damn job!" Knuckles yelled.

"Fuck you!"

"Go to hell!"

"Banana mofo!"

"Black assed hoe!"

Slumping down into their cubicle office chairs whilst continuing to exchange insults, their ears on a familiar voice and watched as a blue hedgehog and a two-tailed fox approach, clapping their hands with sarcastic humor. Their smug smiles were plastered over their faces as they glowered over the agents sitting in front of them; if there was one thing, Shadow hated, it was this blue son that stood in front of him. Shadow and Knuckles have been competing against Sonic and Tails when it came to criminal cases and trying to be the first to apprehend the criminal; a little friendly competition, why not?

"_Just what I needed."_ Shadow thought to himself as he glared at the blue hedgehog.

"You guys are amazing; I mean to have two of G.U.N.'s best agents screw up a whole month of work on this case taking your intelligence to a whole other level, my friends." Sonic gloated.

"Level of nut jobs!" Tails said as he slapped his head, "Who'd have thought that a bunch of birds would swoop right under you, agents?"

As Sonic and Tails continued to gloat, Knuckles picked up the phone and began to dial a number as Shadow pulled out his cell phone when it began to ring.

"Excuse me; I have to take this call. Hello?" Shadow answered.

"Hey, Slim Shady! It's Knuckles! How are you doing?" Knuckles said politely.

"Hey Knuckles. I'm good, what's going on?"

"Did you ever notice how one of Sonic's eyes is smaller than the other and that Tails can't fly with holding on to his wee-wee?"

"What the hell?" Tails responded as Shadow tried to hold his laughter back.

"He's still gotta use the potty trainer since his growth spurt isn't coming through, he might just remain a midget forever. I also heard that Sonic's girlfriend's boobs are going to be boosted up to a D-cup because she wants to catch up with Sonic's; Victoria's Secret had a sale yesterday and he bought the whole store."

"Ouch, wow, below the belt much?" Sonic asked.

"These two idiots are going to be in a movie too!" Knuckles said.

"What's it called?" Shadow asked.

"_The Bitches of the Rings: Fellowship of the Motherfuckers_." Knuckles laughed.

"Damn, we have to go see that!" Shadow replied, "Anyways it was nice talking to you again, Knuckles, but I gotta go." Shadow said as he looked at the clock.

"See you later, Slim Shady." Knuckles said and they both disconnected their calls.

"Sorry about that, now what were you two saying?" Shadow smiled darkly as he watched Sonic's frown shift.

"You really are a class act, Shadow but here's my part, whilst you two are suspended guess who gets to take care of this case?" Sonic said as he poked his thumb at his chest and snickered.

"We'll see you agents, later_. Pew! Pew! Pew!_" Tails said as he formed his fingers into guns and pretended to shoot at Shadow and Knuckles before walking away.

"_Rat bastard._" Knuckles muttered under his breath, "Let's get out of here, Shadow!"

As Shadow and Knuckles headed out of G.U.N headquarters, Shadow began to feel a whirl of stress and anger as he continued to play and replay their meeting with Commander, especially their plan of action to take down Storm. What _ifs_ and _maybes_ continued to float around his head; if he could make the situation any better, he would like to correct the errors of their plan and kick that grey bird's ass and take down the rest of the smuggling ring. Heading over to Knuckles' car, Shadow let out an exasperated sigh as Knuckles started the engine.

"What's wrong, Shadow?" Knuckles asked his partner as steered out into highway.

"I have a double date with Amy in a few minutes and here's the best part: Silver and his girlfriend are the double." Shadow hissed sarcastically.

"Oh, her stuck-up brother is going to make tonight a living hell pretty much." Knuckles said.

"Damn straight."

"Where's the restaurant? Maybe I can drop you off."

"It's down here on Windel Avenue and the fact that the Commander would assign the case to that Faker and Foxboy is no big surprise there."

"His ass has probably got a lot of kiss marks on it; don't let them get to you, Shadow." Knuckles said as he pulled up in front of a beautifully lighted restaurant, "Here we are."

"It's not that idiot that's bothering me, it's how I'm going to tell Amy that I got suspended for a damn month; this is going to break her heart and put everything to waste if we don't hold everything down on time for the wedding." Shadow growled.

Knuckles shifted his frown to the side as he watched his partner withered in misery until he came up with an idea. Reaching into the front compartment he pulled out a spare gun and G.U.N badge from an assortment of other badges and guns.

"What the-?" Shadow said as he took the things from Knuckles.

"I lose my stuff a lot." Knuckles gave a smug smirk, "Take care of the gun."

Shadow gave a small smile, "Thanks, Knuckles. It'd be great if you came in to see Amy before you head home."

"I haven't seen that child in weeks!" Knuckles said excitedly as he exited out of the car with Shadow.

The restaurant was lit with hanging glass lanterns outside and chandeliers on the inside; the main colour was a creamy white for most of the restaurant except for the beige marble flooring, the black marble countered bar with colourful bottles and customers dressed in vibrant colours that brought the restaurant to life. The music was relaxing and the scents of food filled the air; Shadow's ears suddenly picked up on a familiar voice.

"KNUCKLES!" squealed a rose pink hedgehog who held out her arms for the red echidna.

There stood the love of Shadow's life, Amy Rose, who was gracefully adorned in a pretty emerald green dress with black trimmings. Shadow suddenly felt his heart begin to beat a little faster when he saw her dazzlingly green eyes come alive when she saw them walk through the door. Behind Amy sat her brother by the name of Silver and his girlfriend, Blaze who smiled at the duo.

"AMY! Child, where have you been?" Knuckles yelled excitedly and took her in his arms, giving her a tight hug, "BLAZE! You look lovely and Silver…you look…white, my brother! You blend right in!"

"Hey, Shadow!" Amy chirped as she kissed his cheek and he pulled her into an embrace.

Silver struggled to give a smile at Knuckles' comment; he wasn't exactly pleased to be around Shadow especially with the fact as his little sister was going to marry him. While the three friends talked, Blaze sat back with Silver and watched him closely.

"Silver, I think it's best if you just let Shadow-"Blaze whispered.

"No, Blaze, she's my sister and I think it's time the groom snapped into reality." Silver said seriously.

"You're just going to piss him off." said Blaze as she turned her eyes back to the three friends.

"It's time I took my leave, my dear. Time to go Houdini and _POOF!_ Disappear! But I love you like a fat kid loves cake!" Knuckles said as he hugged Amy goodbye and turned to Shadow, "See you later, buddy!"

"So long, Knuckles." Shadow said before helping Amy into her seat.

"I got this, Blaze, everything will be fine." Silver whispered to her feline girlfriend.

"Are you excited, Ames?" Shadow asked with a smile as he sat down.

"Yes!" Amy giggled.

"Still want to marry me?"

"Of course!"

"Hello, Silver, Blaze." Shadow greeted the couple sitting across from him and they smiled back, "So, Ames, how's the planning going?"

"I ended up getting our band! All we need is to send out the deposit cheques for everything and I got the total this morning." Amy said nervously as she gave the balance cheque to Shadow, "It's pretty good, I guess."

He opened up the paper to see $48,000? _Oh boy_, he thought; he was hoping that it also included the honeymoon but he guessed not. The government and economy has really been a pain in everyone's back and with the past couple of cases, Shadow had tackled he would get a good sum of $40,000 a year but with this wedding, it was probably going to leaving him with less than $100,000. Shadow had the money but he also had to think about like moving into a bigger house and other things that they needed and homes didn't come cheap.

"Not bad." Shadow smiled at Amy as he hid his worry.

"Shadow…" Silver cleared his throat, "I know $48,000 seems like a lot and you're one of G.U.N's best agents but married life, it's going to add up and if you're okay with it, I'd really love to do this for Amy."

"Do what, Silver?" Shadow asked.

"I'd like to pay for the wedding, Shadow." Silver suggested with a smile and received a disapproving look from Amy while Shadow's expression stayed.

"How generous of you, Silver. Hmmm, Ames, maybe you could give me and Silver some time to talk." Shadow said.

"Shadow…" Amy said with concern while Blaze began to worry.

"It's been quite some time since we've talked, how about some drinks? What do you like, Silver?" Shadow asked.

"Um, wine."

"Bloody Mary? So one Bloody Mary for Silver, you and Blaze go order and I'll just have some wine" Shadow said with a smile, "You look beautiful, Ames."

"Thanks, love." Amy whispered before heading off to the bar with Blaze to get the drinks.

As soon as the ladies left, the male hedgehogs edged themselves onto the table and their smiles faded away; it was time for a serious time and Shadow had an amount to say. He stared at Silver with a disapproving look while Silver watched Shadow calmly, almost enjoying the show.

"You know very well that I am a G.U.N agent, they give me weapons and a badge to keep this city clean from bad guys like drug smugglers, thieves, murders and such but do you know what pisses me off the most out of all those guys; someone who would try to embarrass another just because he's got his money's worth." Shadow responded, "I only want the best for Amy and you decide to always take that away from her just because you can't stand me, well that's not a surprise. I don't care if you have a problem with me, but when it comes to Amy, I intend to make her as happy as I can without anyone taking that away."

Silver was all ears and listened until Shadow was done and began his part, "Listen, Shadow, Amy is my sister and since I'm all the family she's got I too, wish to make her happy but someone who cannot pay for his own wedding and give his future wife what she dreams of; sounds like another kind of bad guy in my book."

Although Shadow kept a calm mask over his face, he felt his blood begin to boil; _the nerve of this guy!_ Thank God, Amy didn't have any more dodgy relatives because Silver was more than he could handle; what he wouldn't do just to squeeze Silver's little weed shaped head into an oblivion but he had to keep it calm after all, Silver was Amy's brother.

"_Son of a bitch white ass mofo rat bastard."_ Shadow thought to himself as he conjured up more words before he was interrupted by a sweet voice and looked up to see that it was Amy.

"Shadow, can I talk to you?" the pink hedgehog asked.

"Of course, excuse me, Silver." Shadow said as he walked with Amy and pulled her onto the dance floor and began to slow dance along with the couples.

Placing her petite hands on his shoulders, Shadow wrapped his arms around her waist and began to sway her to the relaxing melody of the music. It was times like these that he loved to be with Amy; whenever he felt at his worst, she was always there to bring him back to his senses.

"You know, Shadow, we don't have to have a huge wedding. We could do something simple with a few friends." Amy whispered to Shadow.

"Amy, I want this to be a day that the both of us will always remember and you are going to have the wedding you've always dreamed of." Shadow whispered before spinning her and bringing her back into his arms.

"Are you really sure of this?" Amy asked.

"Of course, I love you and just don't listen to your brother; he's been driving me nuts." Shadow joked making Amy laugh.

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**I'm so tired, stupid exams~**


	3. Chapter 3: The Problems Arising

**Wow, new chapter done at 2:40am; I really need to get out more (NO. I LIE.)**  
**This chapter is much shorter than the others but this is mainly where the problem begins!**

**I don't own any SEGA characters or the movie/movies or songs mentioned. Enjoy the story~**

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The night was still young as Knuckles drove the down the road into his neighbourhood after he dropped off Shadow at his desired location and met up with Amy; his pink friend had grown into a beautiful lady and Shadow was lucky to have her in his life. All day Knuckles had been missing his pearly white wife who had was carrying their future child; he never thought about having kids but all seemed possible when Rouge became more that a friend. With his radio blasting to his favourite song, Knuckles screeched to hit the notes and mould his voice over the lyrics.

_I wanna know what love is  
__I want you to show me  
__I wanna feel what love is  
__I know you can show me_

Pulling into his driveway, he turned off the engine and headed off into house only to trip over a large trash bag that he had failed to see in the darkness. Rubbing the bump on his head, he remember that tomorrow was garbage day and Rouge usually left it outside so by the time Knuckles came home from work, he could put the trash out onto the sidewalk. Dragging the heap of trash, he opened the garbage can and before he could shove the trash into the can, he noticed something familiar. Reaching into the trash, he pulled out a box of Ben and Jerry's Chocolate Fudge Ice cream and a bottle of sparkling apple juice that were both completely empty.

"_What the hell?_" Knuckles thought to himself, "_Could Rouge have possible eaten all of this? I just bought this shit yesterday!_"

Shoving the trash into the trashcan, he jogged into the dark, quiet house and headed downstairs into basement. Walking over into the laundry room, he opened up the washer and found their bed sheets and one of Rouge's favourite undergarments and she wore when they usually…

"Oh, God, you've got to be kidding me!" Knuckles whispered as he slammed the washer door shut and headed upstairs to bed.

Entering into his bedroom, Knuckles saw Rouge snuggled close to her pillow and one hand over her protruding belly; although the scene before him was sweet, he began to feel uncomfortable with some of the things he found. Taking off his shoes and gloves, he slid into bed with his wife and was stuck in thought of the possibility and maybe, just maybe, his wife might be cheating on him.

"_What the hell is wrong with you, Knuckles?"_ Knuckles mentally slapped himself, _"You honestly think your pregnant wife is going to cheat on you? How would that even work?"_

Quite uncomfortable with his train of thought, he turned over and tried to get some sleep. Morning came fast and the sun was peeking through their blinds, setting its sun rays on Knuckles thus waking the red echidna up. Groaning in irritation, Knuckles turned over to find Rouge gone; quickly sitting up, he rubbed his eyes and headed downstairs as he quickly put on his shoes and gloves. Grabbing the bottle and ice cream bottle from behind the closet, he walked into the kitchen to see Rouge calmly reading the morning paper like she always did in the morning; holding onto the 'evidence' behind his back, he decided to proceed with the confrontation.

"Good morning, Rouge." Knuckles said suspiciously.

"Good morning, Knuckles." Rouge said using Knuckles' cynical tone.

Slowly, the red echidna placed the glass bottle and plastic box onto the kitchen table and stepped back, letting Rouge observe the items on the table.

"Are these yours, my dear?" Knuckles asked sarcastically.

"Yes, Knuckles, I figured I'd bring out the goodies because yesterday we finally paid off the house mortgage." Rouge said.

"Oooh snap. I-ugh I guess I forgot." Knuckles shrugged, "Wait now hold up! Did you actually eat all this!"

"Please, just because _I'm with child_ doesn't mean I'm going to eat everything. No, I had Fletch come over."

"Fletch? Our neighbour? Why?"

"You weren't here and I was lonely!"

"Sorry, it's just I get worried and stuff with work I'm just getting all stressed out." Knuckles said as he pinched the bridge of his nose.

"Knuckles, you don't have to jealous of anyone. I love you with all my heart and I am no one else's but yourself; you're just so adorable when you get jealous too be honest." Rouge smiled.

"And I'm just so smooth when I smoke you out." Knuckles smiled smugly.

"What does that mean?" Rouge asked after giving it some thought.

"Can we watch _Stripper in Manhattan _again?" Knuckles asked with a pouty face while Rouge let a laugh and kissed Knuckles on the cheek.

As the white bat looked out the window, she locked eyes with Fletch, a brown porcupine, who was heading off to work and waved at each other which sent a spark of jealous through Knuckles' nerves; he needed proof. Trudging upstairs, he remembered that Sonic had given him a special spy device 2 years ago; a teddy cam. Snatching it out from the deepest corner of their bedroom closet, Knuckles pulled the stuffed bear out of the wrapping and shoved a video camera up the bear.

"Alright, you overstuffed piece of fluff, you're going to keep check things around here when I'm gone." Knuckles said as he placed the toy near Rouge's vanity and pressed record.

Suddenly Knuckles' cellphone began to ring scaring the daylights out of him before he answered the call, "What!"

"A little grumpy today, aren't you, banana man? Anyways I found a way to pay for the wedding." Shadow's voice said over the phone.

"That's great! Hell, I'll come pick you up right now!" Knuckles said as he kissed Rouge goodbye and headed out the door.

"What the hell am I? Your second wife? I can just teleport there." Shadow blurted out.

"Slim Shady, please! I wanna hear all the gossip! I'll be there in a jiffy, sweetums!" Knuckles said as he increased his pitch to a woman's and started the car.

Heading out into the street, Knuckles finally made it to Shadow's quaint home and began throwing stones at his door. Shadow stepped out of the door with a look of disbelief plastered over his face and slid into Knuckles' car and slapped his friend over the head.

"Idiot, do you want to get your ass kicked?" Shadow growled.

"I didn't want to get out, my baby will get lonely!" Knuckles said as he sped ahead, "Alright so tell me your brilliant plan!"

"So after last night's 'wonderful' dinner, I went up to the ARK and I tried to some things of value; I found a hidden storage compartment on the lower level and I found some photos of the early prototype of the ARK Space Colony before it was made and some blueprints." said Shadow as he pulled out four photos.

"Those are some good quality pictures, man! They must be more than 60 years old; how much do you think you can get off of them?" Knuckles asked.

"I called a professor at the University of Remille who teaches about space and he's also been researching about the ARK for the past few years, he said to meet him near some Space Convention at City Hall and there's a store outside called _Nebula_ where he'll meet me at. He said he'd give me about $60,000 for the photos." Shadow smirked.

"$60,000 for the photos? That's- holy shit, you're going kick Silver's ass!" Knuckles snickered.

"Let's not get our hopes up, the guy better show up." Shadow muttered as Knuckles pulled up in front of Nebula.

"It smells like a bunch of nerds!" Knuckles said as he watched kids old and young walk the streets in their best costumes and head over to City Hall.

"Alright, I'll be back in a few minutes; just don't beat up any kids." Shadow said as he got out of the car and Knuckles mocked him from behind as he entered the store.

"Where the hell am I?" Shadow thought to himself as he looked around the store.

It was large with planets hanging from the dark blue ceiling with lights scattered about to make it look like the night sky. He remembered some of the constellations; the Big Dipper, the Great Bear, Ursa Major, you name it. The store was not as busy as the streets so he figured that it would be easier to find the Professor; finally he saw an elderly man, most likely in his fifties, who was reading a book by the asteroid section.

"Professor Green?" Shadow asked as he approached the man.

The professor was dressed is a formal brown suit with a red tie, thick glasses and powder white hair and short mustache; he held a very gentle aura around him and smiled wholeheartedly.

"Ah, Shadow the Hedgehog, I've been expecting you. Now the pictures, may I see them?" the professor asked politely.

Shadow presented the pictures as the professor straightened his glasses and smiled, "They're definetly one of a kind, and I'll take them all."

"Did you bring a cheque?" Shadow asked seriously.

Meanwhile outside Knuckles was hanging around outside the store and was on the phone with Rouge, "I'm tired of being away from you all the time, I just wanna come home and have romantic dinners, maybe even a little booty-cutie!"

Whilst Knuckles was on the phone, he was unaware of the two people dressed in black that ran into the store. As the Professor was about to write the cheque, the store door suddenly burst open and before Shadow could sidestep the criminal, he was hit with a taser and let out a yell as the electricity shocked through his body and kept him paralyzed on the floor. The Professor was knocked out and pulled behind the counter as the two thieves began to grab whatever money and goods they could find.

"Hey, Vector! What junk should I take, man?" asked one of the thieves who pulled down his mask to reveal a purple weasel in order for him to talk to the larger theif.

"Dumbass! Put your mask back on and Vector is not really my name!" the larger theif said out loud and suddenly grabbed Shadow's photos of the floor, "Take the stuff that looks old like this!"

Shadow grunted in pain and his eyes shot open when he saw the thieves steal his photos and tried to get Knuckles' attention as he watched his echidna friend begin to dance around as he spoke to Rouge over the phone, "Knuc- Knuckles…"

Shadow's paralyzed state left him weak and unable to communicate properly; as the thieves stepped over Shadow, one of them recognized a gun secured to his leg.

"Dude, this guy's armed!" one of them squealed.

Shadow's red eyes narrowed in on the unusual markings leading down the larger thief's arm; a tattoo of ninja stars with lines leading straight down towards them, his eyes shot open when he noticed the taser about to shock him again.

"You mother- AARGH! " Shadow yelled in pain and was disarmed.

The thieves ran as fast as they could down the street just like how they entered leaving Knuckles unaware of what happened, a passed out Professor and a pissed off Shadow. Weakly getting off the floor, Shadow was able to crawl to the door and limp outside as he watched the two idiots run away with his effing photos; as Shadow watched Knuckles continue to talk on the phone, his fume burst.

"KNUCKLES!" Shadow yelled in fury.

"We can have a second kid and I can-" Knuckles continued to talk.

"KNUCKLES!"

"Shadow, I'm on the phone!" Knuckles said before he was turned around and grabbed by the collar by Shadow.

"You call yourself an agent! Those bastards took off with my photos, dammit!" Shadow yelled, "Oh by the way, they stole your fucking gun too! I ought to pop a lid in you-!"

"Have a heart! I've got a wife and a kid at home!" Knuckles said as he defended himself from Shadow's fist that was ready to strike.

Their ears picked up on the faint sound of police sirens coming for the down the street; looking back at each other, they both felt screwed at the moment. Soon enough, red and blue lights flashed across windows and buildings as multiple police cars were parked outside the Nebula store and around City Hall as some officers were on pursuit to catch the criminals. Shadow and Knuckles decided to lay low to not attract attention that was until their two rivals arrived on the scene.

"Oh my, Tails, looks like our famous agents are still as rambunctious as before!" Sonic said with a smile.

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**Next chapter is coming up soon!~**


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